Pretty Nervous

Lately I’ve been pretty nervous about all the band thing. I presented in the Youth Art show as a background singer and now I’m presenting at International Day alone. Exactly, ALONE! Pamela, the official singer, is going to ISEF, a science fair thing in the states, and she’ll be gone on the day of the presentation. Apparently, I’m singing all alone in front of everyone.

The songs we’re going to play are:
-This Love – Maroon 5
-I Want You To Want Me – Cheap Trick
-I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For – U2
-Photograph – Nickelback

Pretty exciting huh??

What I’m really worried about is that when I get to stand there and sing I’ll probably lock my voice up and sound like a chicken being raped or something. I hope that doesn’t happen. Even if it does I don’t have the Christina Aguilera voice… but still… I hope it doesn’t sound so bad.

I’m hoping to have it on tape and update it here so y’all can judge me. And I know I promised putting the video of the Youth Art but Gonzalo, my friend who has the video, didn’t finish editing it… so I’ll put it ASAP.

WoW!

One of these days I stayed afterschool… like always. So Bia and I were sitting on a bench talking and Eric was standing up talking to Gonzalo and Matt. Gonzalo left and then I heard Matt telling us to look at him. First let me describe Matt. A typical American. BUT he is so weird. I mean he makes these awkward jokes that no one laughs. And has this outrageous way of living. Okay now continuing the story… he told us to look at him when I looked I couldn’t figure out the image. Then I realized that he was showing us his butt!! He put his pants down! Like everything! I saw his butt! I started screaming OMG it was so gross. Later he told us that Gonzalo paid him to do that. Told him he was acting like a stripper or something getting paid to show things.. Well, he left Brazil and went back the USA today. Guess I’m free from having to look at his butt again.. =)

Youth Art Show

Yesterday was the Youth Art show. It’s an event in my school for art presentations, such as music, art displays and multimedia presentations. And “my” band presented! And I sang! Okay, now the details about that:

I woke up early because I needed to go to São Paulo. I didn’t really want to go but my parents had to so I went. I don’t even have to mention traffic because it was chaos! It’s amazing how there’s so many cars in that city! We would stay 5min just there, in the middle of that ocean of cars without moving. And then we would move 1cm and then stop again! The good side of that is that I had more time to listen to my iPod. When we finally go out of traffic we went to have lunch. I went to a barbeque a friend of mine was having and my parents went to a restaurant. After that I went to great ice cream place and ate so much ice cream I felt like my organs were frozen!

After that we headed back to Campinas. I was supposed to be in school at 15:00 but since I was in São Paulo I got there at 17:00. I had a headache but since I’ve been having those for like weeks it didn’t really bother me, I got used to it. When I got there Eric, Amadeo and Alexandre was already there. Pam hadn’t arrived yet. Well, the night went on we practiced and bla bla bla. It was when the real time came! The host had announced A Little Bit Bigger (name of the band) we were on stage and the song started playing. My mom had been asking me all day if I was nervous, I said no, because I wasn’t. But now I couldn’t feel my legs and I felt as if I was going to collapse at any time. I tried to look for my friends and my mom and dad but there was this light on my face that kind of blinded me. So I just gave up on looking for them. The song was playing and the time was coming when I would sing. I felt as if I was going to open my mouth and a weird noise was going to come out. Well, I sang and for me it was um.. ok?? I can’t really judge because I couldn’t hear myself. So it was as if I was deaf and I was singing something that I had no idea how it would come out. The show finished. And I went off stage. Eric told me that it was great I was so happy even though I knew that he always kind of exaggerates because after all he’s my boyfriend =D. I went to my friend and they said it was good I was so happy! It wasn’t a disaster. But I still don’t know how it really was, I’m the one who has to judge that. Later on I’ll post the video of the show so all you guys can judge and comment on it.

Going to School

Hey y’all. Not it’s 7:17am. I woke up at 6:00am because I feel so sick! But still I am going to school. In 10min my bus will get here. So I better get going. Byebye! I’ll write again when I arrive from school.

My Thursday

Correcting myself actually I do have something to blog about. I went to the mall with some friends on Thursday. Let me tell about that:

I was at school in the morning, it was going to be half-day so half the class did not go to school. I had talked to Eric, my boyfriend, the night before and he had said that he wasn’t going to school and that he was going straight to the mall so we could meet there later on that day (12:00am).

So we went to English class, the weird thing is that Ms.Toomey, the English teacher, said that she didn’t know what to do with us because she had not planned that class. So she gave us different options of what we could be doing. The editorial, silent reading, or any other work we had to do. At first I was going to do my editorial so I went to the computer room and logged in the computer. Well, amazingly enough that computer was the one not working. Funny how I always choose the ones that have some sort of problem. So I had to get back to class and do silent reading. Lorraine, Laura, Bia and I were “reading”. Lorraine and Laura were laying down on the “stage” while they read and Ms.Toomey never let us lay down. So when Ms.Toomey entered the room they both sat up very quickly. We kind of made a joke out of it. And Ms.Toomey laughed about it and it was all okay. But one thing she didn’t understand is that certain things are funny the first time and then when you try to do it again it gets pretty annoying, so I was like: Man, cut it out! Well, poor her. She (Ms.Toomey) left the class to go check on the people doing their editorials. It was then I was reading and everything was quiet when suddenly I hear someone barking / chocking on the door. I was Ms.Toomey. She was trying to re-make the joke that she was coming and that they just sit up again. Some people laughed, but I think they were forcing it because it was more bizarre and scary than funny.

Class ended and we had Portuguese next. We went in the room and we were going to have “Aula da Fala”. That is kind of a project that each student gets an article and presents it to the class. Well, we did the project and just like Ms.Toomey, Cida, the Portuguese teacher, didn’t have anything planned for us that class. So she just told us to sit there. Eventually people started chatting. And she was chatting too. I was talking to Eduardo and Bia. Bia and I were laughing when Cida turned and got all stressed at us because we were laughing! OMG!! Woman! Are we supposed to cry then?! We weren’t making any noise, actually we were the students that were more quiet in the class and she was always getting stressed and mad at us. Well, who cares?

We (Bia, Eduardo and I) were talking when Bia tapped Eduardo on the shoulder. For some reason he lost balance and fell of the chair. But he took the chair with him and fell towards a glass cupboard next to him. I thought the glass was going to break and that he would cut his face opened. But he didn’t… I started laughing so hard and I couldn’t stop. I could tell he was very embarrassed because the whole class stopped and looked at him. But I just couldn’t stop laughing, he looked at me with a mad face. If I could I would’ve stopped laughing and helped him up, but I was out of breathe and no matter how hard I tried I just didn’t stop laughing. My stomach even started hurting. He got up and later on he forgave me for my laughing outbreak.

After Portuguese I had gym. Of course I didn’t bring gym clothes because I was going to the mall later that day. So when I got there I told Rodrigo I wasn’t going to do it. He got all stressed up and everything. And then he started saying I was going to get fat and all. Sure for loosing a gym class that last 30min. A lot of people, mostly girls, didn’t do gym class so he was very mad at us. He started letting the girls that they were going to get fat and no boy would look at them. I told him that first I wasn’t going to get fat because I missed his stupid class and second I didn’t want any other boy to look at me except my boyfriend so his meanness wasn’t working for me. And then you know what he did? He turned to me and said that my boyfriend would cheat on me! That something you should not kid around! I almost turned to him and said: Guy look at you. You are almost 50 and still single. You look like an old giraffe loosing its color and becoming gray. You’re so frikin’ ugly that no even desperate trannies will look at you. But of course I did not say that because I wasn’t in the mood for getting in trouble.

After gym I went upstairs to the lockers to get my bag ready. (I was going to the mall with Bia because her mom was giving me a ride.) When I opened my locker I saw a white sheet of paper folded in two. When I opened it I saw a love poem. I remember Eric had told me he was going to write me a poem but how in the world did it get in my locker. He was the only one who knows my code and he didn’t even go to school that day. I told Bia she started joking that Daniel, a dude from my class, had written the poem. And then she said that Eric gave my code to someone to put there. It was crazy.

Well, I got in the shopping mall and decided to call my mom, after all she was also in the shopping mall and I needed to give her my back pack so she could put it in the car. When I could her the woman that works for us answered. I was like: Vanda, why are you with my mom’s cell phone? And she said she forgot her cell phone at home. So I called my aunt who was with my mom at the mall. And guess what?! The cell phone was off!! How was I supposed to find them in the shopping mall!? I was walking through the restaurants with Bia when I heard Eric calling me. He pointed to where my mom was and said he was chatting with them before I came. I don’t even want to imagine what in the world they were talking about. So I went there and gave my mom my bag.

After that all, the friends came, I had lunch… We went to the movies and it all went fine.
It was pretty fun!

Good or Bad?

I think you all know about my passion towards music. I just love playing it, listening to it, dancing… everything! And I think you guys also know that I used to play bass in the band Mini Rockers. Well, some months ago Pamela, the vocalist of Mini Rockers, asked if I wanted to join her band as a vocalist. Yeah… pretty big for me and kind of a problem… let me explain why:

First because I’ve been wanting to be a “singer” (vocalist for a band or something) since ever! Yeah, you should be thinking then why the hell is being invited to be a vocalist a problem?! That’s because I am very insecure about myself. I’ve been training singing for a long time, but I’ve never sang for someone else but my guitar teacher. And even when I sing to him I don’t really “open” myself and show all I got. That’s because I am so afraid of criticism that I tend to prefer not trying. Because I know that to be good at it I’ll screw up a lot of times and I’m afraid that people will judge me wrongly or something. I can’t really explain it.

Continuing what I was saying. So she asked me and I said yes. I thought that giving it a try wouldn’t hurt anybody. Well, guess who is in the band… my boyfriend! I was like: WHAT!?! I so totally cannot sing in front of my boyfriend he will think I’m a jerk or something. But then everyone convinced me to go and try so I said well ok..
I went and we rehearsed, I am doing back vocals. I was afraid of going lead AND Pam is already lead. On the first practice I went alright, probably because all the times I sang Pam was singing with me. On the next practices it went good too. It was when one day Pam couldn’t go to the practice and I was in “charge”. OMG! It was so horrible! First because I was out of tune. Second because I was so afraid to get something wrong I was singing very low. And third, Ed (the drum guy) said I was singing without attitude. Yeah, imagine how I felt! I got home and started sobbing that I would give up on music and that sometimes people just are not meant to follow their dreams. I felt like those guys who go to American Idol thinking they are the best and then Simon tells them that they suck, and they really do. And I was like, OMG maybe I think I’m not so bad and actually I’m a disaster. It was the end for me. I stopped playing guitar and stopped practicing. I didn’t tell anyone about my decision to stop everything related to music, I’d figure I would announce it on the next band practice.

The day came, when I got there all the song were ready and it was all written down where and how I needed to sing. It was then I felt that I couldn’t just abandon all, everything I most love in life. So I thought, well what the hell. Just forget about everything and everyone. I sang as back vocal and Alexandre (band manager and one of the guitar guys) said I was in tune. I guess he was just trying to make me feel better…

These days Pamela came to me and said she would leave the band because she would start working or something. There are two sides of it.

The good side is that I’ll have the chance to make my dream come true and sing the leader vocal.

The bad side is that I’ll probably deaf everyone in the radius of 5km and have the worst moment of my life singing very badly in front of a lot of people and especially my boyfriend. Who would probably break-up with me because he would be ashamed of the girl he once dated..

So now I don’t know what to do. I’m convincing my mom to put me in vocal lessons. And then I’ll se if I improve… if I don’t.. byebye dream… byebye music… byebye life… haha

I’ll update with my new experiences regarding singing.

Homework on vacation?!?!

I don’t know why but the Portuguese teacher gave a project for vacation!! She said we would have time when we came back to school to do it if we decided not to do it during vacation. But still, vacation is a time for you to relax and enjoy life! How can I do that knowing there’s something else I should be doing, like a project!! And I just can’t relax if I know there’s something on my due list that I didn’t do.

I think my Portuguese teacher shouldn’t have told us all the things we have to do when we go back because now everyday I keep remembering that in some weeks I’ll be full of assignments and homework to do! I wish we had more time for vacation… or maybe that when we’re in school there’s not so many projects and homework. The funny thing is that there are days that the teachers don’t give homework. 0! And we’re free! And it’s so good. But then the next day ALL the teachers decide to give ALL the homework for the next day! Can’t they talk to each other and distribute the homework evenly on the days of the week??

Well, I guess that’s just the way it goes…

Update: First Day of School

I was wrong bout some things…

Amadeo: He’s a jerk!!! He runs in slow motion! And it’s incredible how I always end up in his team in P.E. And we always loose! He’s slower than an obese, 90 year-old woman! Well, he’s in his way to obesity!! He just such an ass!! He said that I’m fatter than he is! If I was fatter that he is I just wouldn’t be able to walk through the door. Well, I just ignored him after that day, and eventually he said he was sorry, but I just walked past him and made him feel like shit. But now I realized that it’s not his fault that he such an idiot, and that he’s not smart enough to make up a topic so he just insult people, and that he isn’t physically healthy to run. It’s just not his fault.

Another Guy: He is such a perv!!!! And he thinks everyone wants him and loves him. Well, that’s not true, cuz I would never want him or love him. I’m sure he’s gay and got a home run with Amadeo. I heard moans coming from the bathroom, and both came out together, apparently Julian is 5 months pregnant. He doesn’t know who the papa is… tough luck.

Real update: Julian is actually nice, and he asked me to change that thing above about him. Well, I just can’t cause sometimes I admire my evilness hahahaha. But Julian isn’t all that. He’s pretty nice actually. So just pretend the things written above is about another guy.

Cass: She’s funny, crazy, and trusty. Right Cass?? hahaha It’s funny how Julian always keep asking me if we talk about him… hahaha He’s so convinced, and egoistic.

Monkey Attacks

In the school I study there’s these cute little, furry monkeys that just hang around on the trees. Yesterday when I was going to class after lunch with my friends Sofy and Alvy we saw the monkeys running on the ground, and jumping on the trees. We thought it was cute but that was just the first impression. We continued walking and talking, it was when we realized they were behind us on the floor. They ran past us and stopped on one of the steps of the stairs and they started to scream with those little mouths with no apparent teeth but with lots of teeth inside. They were just staring at us with those big, brown eyes. We got scared, we started running but some jumped on our front and we stopped. When we looked around us they were all over the place, forming a circle around us. It was so weird, it looked like ritual, or something. One of them stepped on my foot, I jumped on Alvy and we started screaming. Sofy decided to run, two of them started running after her. She was also screaming. After running away, all of the monkeys started fighting, and jumping on one another. It was the weirdest moments in my life, I would never imagine that those cute, puffy animals would attack us like they did.

After getting away from them, we looked up and saw all these teachers and students staring at us, as if we were freaks screaming at those little animals. As if they didn’t SEE them attacking us. Well, it must’ve been kind of funny seeing 3 teenagers all hugged together, screaming afraid of these little creatures. And because of our screams, I guess everyone saw and heard us.

The terrifying moment passed and now we just laugh about. My hypothesis is that the monkeys are in love with Sofy, and they got jealous that she was walking around with us so they tried to attack us, and when they ran after her they were asking her to forgive them, and that it’s not they’re fault they are badly in love with her.

Romantic huh?
Hahaha

Well, I just hope those monkeys calm down, if they don’t Alvy and I will need to stop walking with Sofy so she can have her love moment with them.

First Day Of School

First day at school…
Two Years ago it would sound so natural and happy.

But lately I seem to loose all most of my friends. Beatriz changed school so today was my first day without her. It’s hard to know I won’t hear her laughing, or hear her angry again. I know I’m being dramatic, and that I can actually call her and we can go to the movies. But it’s not the same, like waking up and knowing that you’ll have a great day no matter what because the people you most adore will be there with you.

Another friend that I lost is Danilo. We knew each other since we were 3. We were always laughing, I remember when once we had a party in our class, and each one was supposed to bring one food or utensils for the party. People brought 4 ice cream containers. And for the party people only opened one of them and ate just a little. Danilo, Anna, Raquel (I think it was her) and I stayed until 5:00pm. And we didn’t have anything to do and we were starving. So we decided to get the ice cream. Well, each one ate one whole box! I remember that when we were in the middle and we would change ice creams to change the flavor. After eating everything, I was freezing cold and I couldn’t even think of ice cream again. I didn’t eat anything until the next day.

We were really friends, and one day in 6th grade he mentioned he might get out of the school, we (my friends and I) tried to get that idea out of his head. But the topic just didn’t come up again. He didn’t show any seriousness. After all, sometimes as a joke we say we are leaving school so people can treat you nicely and you can feel how people would miss you. Well, the last day from 6th grade was normal. One week later in msn he told me he would never go back, that he moved to another school. I was so shocked. At first I thought he was kidding but after I realized he wasn’t. I asked him why he didn’t tell us so we could say goodbye to him. He said that he didn’t want to go through the process of goodbyes and everything.

He now lives in my condo. But he’s just not the same. Ever since he moved to this school that apparently only have people with bad manners he is being so annoying. I guess sometimes this is just how life goes, goodbyes and hellos. I don’t call him or anything because I know he’s not the same, now he has these bad friends, which keep talking him into bad things. The only thing I know is that I’ll miss all the fun we had.

Changing topic…

Today we got our schedule for classes. I was devastated when I found out that I wouldn’t have as much classes with my two best friends Sofy and Alvy. But I didn’t complain because then everyone would think I’m a preschooler that can’t handle going alone without her friends.

We have three new students in our class:

Julien. He’s from New Jersey. He’s really cool, in the beginning I thought the boys weren’t getting along well with him but now I noticed that Matheus and Italo are having a whole lot of fun. He seems really funny. I didn’t really have the chance to talk to him yet, but I’m sure he’s a great guy.

Amadeo (I think that’s how to spell it) He is so funny. He’s from Campinas, but his English is not that bad. It’s incredible how he can make you laugh about the stupidest things ever. I mean, he made the word agenda seem funny. So when you’re near him you can’t really be serious because he is telling a joke or just talking to himself.

Cassandra. From England. I just loved her! I love her accent, it’s so stylish. And I love her style and her look. (Blond, blue eyes) And she’s so out going. I can’t believe she also watches Lost. She seems to be a great friend.

Of course, new year, new teachers. I don’t have anything to complain about that, just that I wished I had history and geography in Portuguese but that fine with me. I think I’ll have a good year, I just hope Alvy and Sofy are my friends as last year.